Rapport is a deep process that’s mostly out of consciousness. How do we know? Because people that don’t have the ability to respond consciously still respond to rapport techniques. That’s one reason rapport techniques are practically unstoppable.
Notice how Naomi Feil uses rapport techniques, music, touch, rhythm, eliciting past experiences and more to reach an Alzheimer’s patient.
Notice how she uses the patient’s own world-model to reach her — by singing spiritual songs she knows are meaningful for the patient (Gladys Wilson). While she’ll never win an award for singing, she wins one from me as a wonderful, caring human being.
What Can We Learn About Rapport and NLP From Naomi Feil?
There’s so much. Here’s what comes to mind…
- Use the client’s model of the world and what’s important to them to reach them.
- Rapport is a deep, largely unconscious process.
- There are many elements of rapport besides the words you use. You can use rhythm, movement etc.
- You can use music and touch to elicit past states and meanings.
For more about how to build rapport skills effectively, see The Practical Guide To Rapport And Advanced Rapport.